ext_120727 ([identity profile] owdbetts.livejournal.com) wrote in [personal profile] sesquipedality 2005-05-21 12:26 am (UTC)

I think it's dangerous to read too much into such things.

The problem is that the basic rule about 'please' and 'thank you' is that it's required to utter these phrases in precisely those contexts in which they are traditionally expected, but they generally carry no real meaning...

Omiting such a word is generally just a protocol mismatch; these words don't typically carry any sincere meaning in any case (though they can do, in the right context).

I'm reminded of something I was told many years ago, namely that in some Indian cultures 'thank you' is reserved solely for circumstances in which someone does something they're not obliged to. And yet people coming to the UK from (those parts of) India quickly have to learn our use of 'thank you' otherwise they seem incredibly impolite. You could easily argue that this Indian usage is more sincere, and the British habit of, for instance, thanking a shop keeper for giving you the change that you are legally entitled to is pretty meaningless, and devalues the phrase...

It's all just protocol, and we tend to notice when people break protocol, but that's generally just all it is -- a protocol mismatch...

-roy

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